A Sincere Advice From Me: Stay Away From Medical Degree!

Yes, I am a medical student and some might say that I shouldn't be making this kind of remark or advice but yes, I'm still standing to my point: If you are thinking of taking up doctor as your profession, please stop and rethink about it. Let me tell you a few points about medical students' life that lead me to advising people to rethink about their decision to choose medical profession.

1. You don't have any life.

All your friends are having the time of their life: working and earning money, enjoying their life by going anywhere they want, travelling, having a great vacation, some are married and some even having their third or second child already! How about you? As a medical student, yes, you can say you are having fun as well. The fun of having experiences that other people doesn't get to experience or go through like the fun of slicing and cutting the human body part in anatomy class, the fun of holding real human organs in your own hand, the fun of stitching up wounds like you are sewing dresses and the list goes on. Yes, you are having so much fun of being surrounded by piles of books and notes and information that keeps renewing each time you are halfway through your books, exams that come once in few days or weeks that forces you to keep reading and studying almost all the time, burning that midnight oil for that sudden presentation tomorrow, oncall for 36 hours straight even though you're still a medical student and not a doctor yet, get screw up in front of patients for forgetting that one small information because you couldn't focus for being too tired and having too much in your mind, constantly being call stupid and useless by specialist and other superior and the list goes on as well. You seldom have the time for yourself, even when you wanna relax you think about the test that you haven't studied for tomorrow, the syllabus that you need to cover which is the whole book and maybe few more other books about the disease and mechanism that you need to understand. Just looking at all your friends enjoying their life makes you feel so jealous and sometimes depressed because you wish that you could be like them and only that time that you begin to realize that taking medical degree is one of the worst thing you have done in your life. 

2. You don't have time to be healthy

Do you think that being a medical student or a doctor keeps you healthy because you know all the diseases and sickness in the world and knows how to treat them? No, you are wrong! Yes, maybe you are partly right in the sense of knowing the diseases and how to treat them. But the ugly truth is, even though you have all the knowledge, sometimes it's just inevitable to stay healthy because you have so many things to do. Normal adult people need at least 8-10 hours of sleep to be healthy and keep your body in the optimal condition for maximal performance. But you forgot one thing, university students especially medical students, rarely get enough sleep everyday. We have to study and study and study, prepare for case presentation if you are in clinical and so much more. Lack of sleep for a long time can decrease your performance and can lead to serious problems in the future. It's not like we don't know about the possible problems about this but our conditions don't allow us to do so. Sometimes, we even have to skip breakfast and even lunch because we are too busy. You have to arrive in hospital early in the morning and you didn't take your breakfast because you woke up late for sleeping in late last night. Sometimes, you are too busy clerking and checking the patients or doing some errands for the residents and specialists make you don't have time to even take your lunch. Of course, this might not happen everyday but there will be time where this kind of situation comes up and make you miss your lunch. And sometimes the first meal of the day is the meal you had when you finally goes back home after a full tiring day. That is why lots of medical students have problems like gastritis and most people doesn't realize this. This is true even after you become a doctor. Too many patients to attend to and after you finish all, you look at your watch and realized that lunch hour is over and you have to for your ward round at two. Hungry and tired but there's no way you can go to eat and leave out the patients who are waiting for you in the ward just so they can ask you about their conditions. When you are tired and lack of sleep, your immune system becomes weaker and it's easier for you to be sick. Seeing hundreds of patients everyday, everyone with different sickness, do you think with your weak body and immune system, you won't catch sickness from the patients? I don't think so. Oh yeah, did I mention that you might develop some mental disorders too? Starting with stress that slowly develops into depression, anxiety, sometimes hallucination, manic, addiction and even bipolar. Yes, these are the kind of disorder you might get even if you are physically healthy. 

3. You won't be rich

If you want to be rich, you chose the wrong path my dear. If you want to be rich, go for other profession such as business. That is a much wiser choice rather than you jumping into medical profession to earn money. Yes, some doctors may be rich, that is only after years and years of working and saving the money and it all depends on which sector you are working for, government or private? Studying medical needs a lot of money, the tuition fees is one thing, you still have to buy medical books and all the medical tools and instruments that you need during your study like stethoscope and sphygmomanometer which are quite expensive. After you graduate, you still have to work your ass off and get paid lesser than what you deserve and pay off the loan you got for your tuition fees. For those who get scholarship, they are lucky but for those who didn't? Think about how pity they are. 

The above are my reasons of telling people not to choose doctor as profession. Yes, I feel so stressed up, I regretted so many time and that feeling of remorse hasn't left me yet after 6 years of medical school, I'm tired and sick of everything but one thing that keeps me happy is the feeling you get after you save someone's life, the feeling you get when someone you treat gets better and they thanked you and smile to you for treating them. That feeling always overcome all the negative feeling I have previously and made my day. In the end, it all goes back to yourself. What is your main reason for choosing doctor in the first place? What is your motivation that drives you to jump into this profession? If your answer is saving life, then I believe nothing in this world can stop you from becoming a good doctor. Only a pure intentions goes through everything. But if your answer is for the money, fame and the title you get behind your name, then you might face harder time compare to other people. Believe me, God will always bless good people with good intentions. Of course. the things that I mentioned above might differ a bit depending on where you study or practice your profession in the world but overall, it doesn't change much and basically every medical student will face the same problems as me. I just hope that you will think properly and ask yourself, why do you want to be a doctor in the first place? If you goes forward with the wrong intentions and reasons, you will not only ruin yourself but you might harm other people as well, especially your future patients. I hope you choose well. 

Thank you for bearing with me until the end of this post. Have a nice day! 

Remember, for those who are struggling, think about the feeling you get after saving a life and receiving a simple smile and thanks from your patients. Stay strong! :)

Kill Me, Heal Me

I just finished watch a korean drama with the title "Kill Me, Heal Me". To be honest, my friends have been bugging me for quite some time to watch this drama but I ignored her since I don't really have the mood to watch another new drama during that time. Plus, I thought that the drama will be boring like all the other drama, you know, the typical type of korean drama, the same plot over and over again and you can even guess the plot and story without watching the drama. But man, I was wrong big time. How i started to watch this drama also because of a funny reason. I asked a friend of mine to help me and in turn, she wanted me to watch the first episode of the drama, only after that she will agree to help me. So I was kinda desperate so yes, I did finally watch it even though I was a day late. So here's what happened.

This drama is actually about a young rich chaebol (rich family's kid in korea are called by this name) who has a disorder called Multiple Disorder Personalities or Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) due to bad childhood experience. He met with a first year psychiatrist resident and she ended up being his secret physician to help him recover from his disorder. There is a lot of twist in the drama (as you can expect in a korean drama) but I like the twist since the twist is mostly related to the cause of the disorder. I find the psychiatry part in the drama really interest me (I'm a medical student, what do you expect :D ). She helps her in secret and even lied to her family about her leaving for John Hopkins University to study a bit more for her residency but she was caught in the end. After some time, it was found that the psychiatrist was actually part of his scar that has made him turn that way. I won't talk much about the story here, if you want to know about the story, please please please I beg you, JUST GO AND WATCH IT ALREADY! You won't regret it. It will make you think more about life, about how scars in our past can really affect us if we don't learn to deal with it. It is indeed a very good story. 

While watching it and after finishing the whole drama, it made me think a lot. This drama succeeded in helping me feeling empathy towards the main character. I can literally imagine and feel his pain and I can even understand his thought and emotion that made him splits his personalities. All of those personalities have different personalities (yes, it might sound weird a personality having personality but just think of those personalities as a real human then you will understand) and there's a different story to which they are created at first. But the one personality that really left me a deep impact is Shin Se Gi. He was created by the main character when he was 7 years old when his childhood friend was abused by his father. Due to the immense pain he bears inside, he created him, a vicious and dangerous person. At first, Shin Se Gi seemed like a very dangerous person, because he will only appear when something bad happened, like in a fighting scene or after seeing something abusive. He will always try to kill someone whenever he's out and that's why he is regarded as the most dangerous personality among all. But towards the end, I found out that he actually was the most broken and sad one. That is why he is acting like that. He was created to protect someone. I don't know if it is right for me to feel sad when one by one, his personalities are leaving him which is actually good for him because it means that he is healing, but because all the personalities are created due to different reasons, and the reasons were all related to his pain and sufferings he's been enduring all his life. I think it's because of this, I feel sad seeing the personalities leaving him because they were made to protect him at one point, to protect him from all the immense pain, the pain that he can't share with anyone, not even with his family. Imagine how much pain a 7 years old child been enduring for him to create so many personalities just to escape from the pain and sufferings. 

For the first time, I can really see the inside life and process of a patient with DID. Even if it's just a drama, even if it's fake, there's still some part of truth to it and they really opened my eyes and make me see things more clearly. They made me remember the reason why I wanna be a doctor in the first place. To the director of that drama and to all those involved in making this drama especially to the actor and actress, this drama becomes better because both of them are really good in acting and successfully bring out the message to all of the viewers out there. For the first time after so long, I'm getting this feeling again. I'm thankful that I have the chance to watch this drama and I think this drama will be the reason on how I decide in the future for my work. Gamsahamnida! Good job to the drama team. Two thumbs up for you :)

Stress!!!

I've never felt this stress before. Whatever I do, I can't take my mind off that thing. Something happened recently and I seriously don't know how to react to it. For the first time in my life, I'm acting like I know nothing, I'm acting like I'm so stupid for not doing what I used to do or what I should do. I'm at total loss but I don't know what to say to the other person without hurting him. I never wanted things like this to happen. I don't want to ruin the friendship between us. I guess he just haven't got to know the real me. I want to say I can't but I don't know how to say it. Things are different when your family are friends. I'm not that easy thinking girl, I think about lots of stuffs, present and also future. How can I face him if we were to bump into each other next time? Especially when his family is there? I feel like hitting my head on the wall, I want to get all these shit out of my head. How I wish things didn't happen, then I wouldn't be in this situation now. I want to pour everything out, I want to shout, I want to cry, but I don't know how and I don't know if I can even do that. I'm just confused. Everything feels like a dream, a bad dream that I had from being too emotional and stressful lately. But snapping my finger, I realize this is not a dream. This is a reality, a reality that hits you with all kind of unexpected stuffs and demands you to figure out yourself how are you going to face and overcome it. For more than ever, I need God's help. I want to be free from all these confusion. I don't want anything else. For now, I just want to go forward without any distraction, to finish what I've came here for and achieve my ultimate dream. Just that, and I'm already happy. 

My Dreams~

I believe everyone have dreams, I'm not talking about the dream that you get when you are sleeping but dreams that you wanted to reach, things that you wanted to do in life before you die. I have a few in my list, a list of stuffs which I myself are not sure whether I can achieve it or not. These are my long time dreams since I was young until today. Most of the stuffs that's going to be listed here later composed of mainly adventure. When I was young, I've always wanted to go around the world and make my dreams come true but when I slowly grew up, life has made me rather a cowardly person and suddenly, I am afraid to go for some of my dreams. I still have the heart to make them come true but when the chances came, I wasn't dare enough to go for it. And I hate myself for a long time until recently when I came across a blog about climbing Mt. Kinabalu, where the person described everything about the experiences so beautifully. And suddenly my passion came back. As written in my previous post, I am a medical student and being involved in this field, it means that you won't have much of free time for yourself. But I believe when there's a will, there's a way. So in the end, I've decided to make a list of my own personal dreams, waiting to be made true in the future. This list might be a bit short and simple but I believe to make yourself start, start from something small, then slowly you can move on to the next bigger one. So here it goes.

1. Exploring nature with my dad

My dad is a forest officer and he's been to forest many times especially the 3 main conservation forest in Sabah- Maliau Basin, Danum Valley and I forgot the other one but it's a new virgin forest which means it hasn't been explored much by homo sapiens ( hehehe, I purposely use the word homo sapiens to make it sound more cool XD). There's a lot of waterfall in the heart of these forests and I really wanted to try explore one of it first. Since I'm not really a fit person, I chose a simpler one to begin with: Takob Akob Fall which is situated in Maliau Basin. For more info about Takob Akob Falls, please click here. I really love waterfall so much and this waterfall is 38m in height which makes it the highest waterfall in Maliau Basin. Maliau Basin is a very pretty place for nature lover and there's many stuffs you can do there and they do provides packages for people who wishes to go there. I've been there once for a school program but I never once regretted it. In fact, I am really grateful that I chose to go and I gotta thank my dad for encouraging me to go saying this is a once in a lifetime chance as it was free that time (everything is paid by the organizer). Thank you dad for showing me a place as wonderful as Maliau Basin. I guess being her daughter does give me the love for nature :) Oh yeah, for anyone interested to explore Maliau Basin, just go to this website and check it out. I can guarantee you, you won't regret it!

2. Climbing Mt. Kinabalu

This is quite a hard task for me because the height of the mountain itself and the condition of my body. I had a history of asthma when I was young but I didn't get any attack from it after I grew up. As for myself, I am a bit overweight and doesn't exercise on a daily basis so I'm kinda scared to go for this. But guess what? I've already climb a mountain before and it's Mt. Merapi situated at West Sumatera, Indonesia with the height of 2891m. It is an ACTIVE volcano and two months after the climb it started to emit smokes and the authority has put the Mt to Alert Level. Actually I never plan to go for the climb because I thought that I couldn't plus I didn't prepare myself for the climb. But due to my friend constant nagging, in the end I agreed to go on the last minute. And that was my biggest yet the best mistake. Let me tell you, DO NOT ever go for a mountain climb without a constant exercise for at least a month before the climb. Make sure to prepare yourself to the best fitness level you can before the big day as you will realize then that the climb requires a great level of fitness especially for a people that doesn't exercise like me. But it was the best mistake ever because if I didn't agree to go for it, I wouldn't knew today what I can do and how wonderful the experience can be. So my advice, if you were to make a decision, think wisely and don't choose a decision you will regret forever, like what an old friend of mine always told me. Indeed, it is wise. 

By the way, back to the topic, since I managed to climb Mt Merapi, I decided to put Mt Kinabalu next on my list. Mt. Kinabalu is the highest mountain in Malaysia and Malay Archipelago. I'm not sure whether this can be achieve but I really hope someday I can go for it and live the rest of my life as a happy girl. I've already did some small research about it and it's actually easy to book for the climb. You can click here for info about everything regarding the climb including how to book, things to bring, some tips of climbing and etc. 

*extra note: I forgot to mention that DO NOT take any heavy food before climbing any mountain as this will make you nausea and sick and a possibility of vomiting even at the beginning of the climb. Just take something light and don't forget to bring lots of energy bars and chocolate for your climb. If you're not sure what are the things you needed to bring for a climb, just check out the link above for Mt. Kinabalu. They tell you everything you need to know there. 

3. Travel to at least 3 of my dream places

I have many dream places to go but the top 3 would be South Korea, UK and Paris. Korea is my first place I really wanna go because i fell in love with the food and also the scenic view of Korea. Of course, I got to know SK from korean drama and in the drama they always show beautiful places around the Korea which has then made me feel deeply in love with. Oh yeah, the food looks great too. I hope to one day visit Korea and go to their street vendor for various food tasting. Just thinking about it made my salivary gland active kekekeke. UK and Paris is a place with many sightseeing activities, and I just love the buildings and the culture. I'm not sure about Paris though but what made me fall in love with UK is their english accent and the people there are very friendly from what I heard. The men are gentlemen and I really love the manners and I've met a few British people in the past. They certainly live up the name of a civilized society. Paris is a City of Love and I hope that one day I can come here with my husband and enjoy our own sweet time there. Another place which I wanted to go is Rome and I wish to visit Vatican City together with my parents. I hope I can see the Pope even from far, just like how the Muslims go to Mekkah, Catholics go to Vatican City. 

4. Travel to few islands

I love island so much, the beach, the wind, the sand and the relaxation you feel while breathing in the fresh salty air of the sea. I would really love to go for snorkeling in those island and explore the beauty of the undersea life. I'm not good in swimming and still learning it but I went to Mataking Island before for a school program as well, and I thought snorkeling is a very scary thing to do since I can't swim. But the moment I put my face into the water and look inside the water, it was so beautiful that it almost took my breath away. At that moment, all my fears were gone and I was stunned by the beautiful biodiversity in the sea. Next time, I will try my best to make time to go for another trip to island in Sabah. 

While finding for something else, I came across this website where you can book a tour to many tourist attraction in Sabah. You can check it out and tell me how it goes with your tour later in the comment. 

Sabah is a very beautiful place, with friendly people and so many places to go and explore for nature lover and not to mention a food heaven for food lover especially the seafood. Sabah is famous for its fresh and cheap seafood and it definitely won't let you down. Don't worry, there's lot of places for shopping as well. 

Maybe that's all for my dream list for today. My list might be longer in the future and I hope to fill it in with various exciting adventure for my life diary and to you, I hope whatever dream you have, don't be afraid to go forward and make your dreams come true. I used to be scared to go for what I wanted to do but I ended up regretting every minute of my life and made me stuck with my past and if I were given a chance, I would like to go back to the past and change everything. So please be brave and just go for it, you might be scared at the first time but when you start to do it, you will find that it is very exciting and fulfilling especially after you have completed it. Till then, good luck for your dreams and have a nice day! 

Thesis..why are you so harsh on me?

Yes, thesis! My medical school requires all of us to do a thesis before entering clinical year. Thesis is a must in our third year and we have around one year to complete it before entering the hospital. So, what happen to me is I was too lazy to start doing my thesis plus all the exams made me think twice to do my thesis. You see, it's kinda hard to focus on your studies and exams while doing your thesis at the same time. So for lazy and unmotivated people like me, we kinda just skip the thesis part and only think about the exam part. 

Actually, I wasn't that lazy at the beginning. The process basically goes like this:

1. You choose 3 titles for your thesis and hand up the form to the academic and they will choose one of the title you've given as your thesis title and the form will be given back to you.

2. You will then be given 2 preceptors to help you with your whole thesis. ( They won't help you do the thesis of course, but you can consult to them what you should do with your thesis.)

3. You have to meet up with your preceptor and talk to them about your thesis title. If you're lucky, your title will be accepted straight away by your preceptor but if you're not, you will need to change the title again until your preceptor is happy with the title. (I myself have changed my title for 3 times..fuhh~)

4. After your preceptors agree on your title, get their signature on the previous form and give it back to the academic for them to keep all the details about your thesis together with other students'. 

5. When you're done with it, you need to arrange with the academic to choose 3 examiners for you and a date for your proposal exam. 

-finishing your thesis is one problem but finding a date where at least 2 of your examiners and 1 of your preceptor are free and able to come for the exam is another big problem. (I have a friend that tried to find a date free for everyone and only success in finding one after one month.)

6. Depending on your performance on your proposal exam, you might need to do a bit revision and correction on your proposal and then start with your research before finally sitting for the final thesis exam.

To be honest, I find it really hard sometimes to do this and I extremely hate this thesis thing because I'm stuck here with only thesis grabbing me from entering clinical years. I actually even had a thought of quitting medical school because I felt so horrible and demotivated by this thesis. Seeing my friend to enter clinical one by one is really a hard thing to do especially I'm totally clear from all the blocks (block is the system they use where one semester consists of 3 blocks-each block is learning about different body system and there are a total of 21 blocks altogether) plus with constant nagging from my mother about me doing nothing and kept asking me to go back (mom, I am doing something ok? Who says I'm not doing anything, I'm trying to do my thesis here!) I'm sorry mom, you have to be patient about meeting me, I know you miss me already but let me do my thesis first and let's see what fate brings us k? hehe..I can't go home now because going home would mean longer wasted time ( I won't be able to finish my thesis at home..temptations are everywhere dude! How can you resist them? :P ) 

Now I'm back to doing my thesis again after stopping for quite SOME times ( more of a LONG time LOL)

and I did noticed something. When you starts to do something, please please please I beg you, this is for your own good, please don't ever stop doing it because once you stop, the enthusiasm will definitely be gone like *zooopp* and you will find yourself wasting time surfing internet for some useless stuffs, watching some korean drama, eat play sleep like today's your last day on earth and feeling worst each day because you realized you can't get going to do your half done thesis, simply because the mood is gone. If you wanna relax just go ahead and relax, but don't get too far away and forgets your thesis. If you lost the mood, FORCE YOURSELF! I'm that damn type of person that can't do anything if I don't have The Mood but because I know if I don't do it, I WILL REGRET IT in the future. So I did, I force myself to start it again and thank God I can't stop now. One last thing, never forget to ask help from God. He is the best help you can ask for and He will definitely help you in whatever you need. Just be sincere when you ask for help. 

That's all for today's post. Whatever problems you have in medical school, just remember, you have walked so far to come to this day, why waste them all and give up? 

Cheer up, best wishes from me,

missfebruary14  <3

Straight As in SPM, go for DOCTOR?

Hi everyone! First, I would like to congratulate those who score well in their SPM and to those who didn't, please please please don't be sad and. Bad SPM result doesn't mean you can't have a bright future. Your future is still bright as long as you work hard for it. There is more to life than just SPM result :) Well, I can't believe that my first post will be about this. I actually plan to write a while ago but I kept on forgetting as I had so many stuffs to do. Since the SPM result was announced yesterday and there were a few articles about should they take on medical after getting good result, I decided to talk a little bit about this.

To start with, I am a medical student myself so I know exactly just what you are going to experience if you continue to take medical course. Of course, before going to study medical, you need to go for pre-U programme first. There are a lots of choices to go for, be it Matriculation, STPM, or some other choices like A-Level, SAM (South Australian Matriculation) etc. Just go for the Education Fair that normally will be held after sometime before and after SPM to help the students to choose which one suits them the best. Just make sure to really understand the pros and cons of every programme. After you have completed your pre-U, this is the time to apply for medical course. Taking that you have already pass the minimum requirement and successfully entered medical school, there are a few facts that you need to know if you really want to choose doctor as your career in the future. Bear with me for a while because this will take quite some time to finish off.

1. Life in medical school is like a race.

What does it mean? It means that once you start your medical school, you have to start study NON-STOP and keep on revising on everything. Once you stop, you will have a big possibility of failing your exam and you absolutely don't want that to happen right? Just like a race, once the pistol is shot, you have to start sprinting until you reach the ending line, in this case, NONE. There is no end line if you become a doctor. Being a doctor is a lifelong process. Means? Doctors are attached to lifelong learning process, as long as you ARE a doctor, you will always need to continue to read and learn even AFTER you graduated from your medical school. There will always be new drugs, new therapy and new treatment. So if you think that you only need to study until you graduate, you are extremely wrong. 

2. You will feel stupid ALL THE TIME.

No matter how smart you are and how good your results are when you were in high school, even if you are the top student, in medical school, somehow there will be people who are smarter than you. Besides, you will keep on making mistakes even a small one and medical school will always have a way to make you feel stupid. Small mistakes like not knowing how to differentiate veins, arteries and nerves in anatomy class because everything look the same, for remembering the wrong order of sign and symptoms of inflammation, or forgetting the process of metabolism of fat cells is enough to make you start feeling stupid. That feeling you will get it more often once you enter clinical. In the end, you will feel more depressed, feeling down and unable to study properly which will end up with bad result and causes you to feel more stupid and the cycle goes over and over again. 

3. You won't have as much time as you used to for resting.

Since you need to study so much, resting more means not having enough time to cover everything you need to study. Medical is unlike high school. Remember we used to complain how thick our maths and biology book are? Medical books are way much thicker that those books and there are MANY of them waiting to be open to be read. I will give an example of how thick the books are: If you take an anatomy book and throw it to your friend, he/she will have a high possibility of having a dislocation or a bruise. Now you get it? I'm not saying that you shouldn't rest or wouldn't have time to rest because after all, resting is an important time for our body to recover and heal itself from all those hard work. Time management is very crucial, the better you manage your time, the better you rest you will get :)

4. You will have almost no time even for yourself.

Before medical school, Saturday and Sunday are our happy days but after medical school, they are no more happy days but miserable days. Last time, Saturday means hanging out with our friends or our family and enjoying to the max but this time, Saturday means sitting in front of the laptop studying the anatomy book and physiology book because next Monday you will be having anatomy exam and on Tuesday you will be having the physiology exam. On Sunday, still studying but this time studying for tutorial and preparing last minute for the anatomy exam then go to sleep and waking up the next morning with swollen eyes because you didn't get enough sleep last night.

5. Patient is always FIRST!

Most of my point I've mentioned previously are almost all regarding the time IN medical school, which means the things you will face when you are STILL a medical student. BUT one of the most frustrating thing that will happen to you after you become a doctor is whatever you do, PATIENT IS ALWAYS FIRST. 

Yes, I am still a medical student but I know the feeling of doctors working in hospital because I've watched them, how they work, what they do and how they spend their time during my one month attachment in one of the hospital in Malaysia. It's worst when you are still a houseman. You go to hospital when the sun is not out yet and you go back home when everybody at home is sleeping. Sleep for few hours, get up and repeat the whole process over and over again for the whole week. You only get a few days off from each department and you will only be granted your sweet day off if you have valid reason. Sometimes, after you went home, something happen in the hospital to the patient you treated this evening and the MO on-call calls you back to ask you a few things and you have to rush back to the hospital when you are just about to change and take a nice shower before you sleep. Another example, a routine working day for a doctor (MO and specialists) is starting from 8am, you will go for ward round and maybe finishes around 9am-9.30am or later depending on the number of patients and wards to be attended. Then, you go down to the clinic and starts your clinic work and start checking patients. Your phone rang and when you check it, it's your family but you couldn't pick it up because you are so busy with attending patients and referring patients for various procedure. Around 12.30pm, your family maybe your husband/wife/mom/siblings came and bring you lunch and you had to make them wait because you still have patients to attend and your family had no other choice but to wait for you to finish up the clinic because they want to eat with you. So they waited until 1.30pm when you last patient came out from the room and you have to make them wait for a little while more as you need to set up the last appointment from other department for the patient just now and just the moment you finish and was just about to sit down and eat with your family, a phone call came and it says you need to come to A & E asap because a MVA patient just came in and stop breathing and you need to run again to attend that patient. Once again, you are sorry that you have to leave your family behind because since you are a doctor, PATIENT COMES FIRST. Whatever you do, saving patient is your first priority and will forever be. I hope you understand the point that I'm trying to say here. No matter how guilty you feel, no matter how sad you are, you can't change the fact that you need to run to hospital because there has been a major accident, patients are overflowing and the hospital is in need of all the staffs they can get even if it means you have to leave behind your wife who has just given birth, rejecting the call from your mom that waited so long just to talk and listen to your voice because a baby in the ward suddenly turn blue and stop breathing etc. These are just a few examples and in your whole life as a doctor, you will absolutely need to make more sacrifices more than you can think of.

6. Your friends will slowly distant away from you.

"Hey, let's go for a drink this Saturday. 7pm at A Cafe. See you there!" "Oh I'm so so sorry, I can't go coz I'm working night shift that day." "How about next Friday night?" "I'm sorry, I'm working as well." This might happen to you after you become a doctor and in the early stages, you will have to reject many of those offers to go hangout with your old friends but in the later stages, you won't have to do it again because slowly you will get lesser and lesser invitation and in the end they will stop calling you. Yes, you will be sad and hurt by it but you can't expect your friends to understand you and your situation. People will always think, if they value something, they will try and make time for it regardless of how busy they are but do you think that they will understand that you can't leave because even though your patient is looking stable now and breathing normally, can suddenly develop dyspnoe and seizure anytime? Imagine if no one is there looking after the patient, what will happen to the patient? Even your family won't understand you, only you and your colleagues understand the hardships doctors are going through. Unless any of your friends or family members are in medical field, do not expect them to understand you. You can't. They won't be able to. In the end, it's only you. 

7. The stress is OVERWHELMING.

I think I should mention this point earlier but never mind as long as I didn't forget to. For this point, it will start from the moment you enter medical school. When you realize after that whole week of burning midnight oil, you still have a lot to catch up with the previous lecture and to study for exam, you will start to feel stress, or even before that you will be so stressful already. The exam is coming, a whole pile of books and notes waiting to be studied, that presentation to prepare, all these will absolutely make no effort at all to make you feel stress. The sudden exam in clinical, the fear of making mistake because you are directly dealing with human lives, and many more to be mentioned here. In fact, almost everything in medical school is stressing you. In my case, I think one of the biggest stress factor is the fact that nothing can stay long in my head even after reading it for so many times. I hate it so much and at the same time, I'm stress because if it continues to happen, I will fail my exam and I will have to repeat it which will waste more time and energy and happiness of course. 

8. You won't be as rich as hell after you become a doctor.

Aiming to get that fortune? I suggest you to take up business studies. Some people say doctors are a good career because they got paid handsomely! Are you sure? How sure are you? Doctors' pay are not even commensurate with the work they've done. Imagine, getting paid only rm4k-6k for all the extended working hours, the holidays that you hardly get, the workload you get everyday, the lack of sleep, all the mental torture you get, and you call that good pay? Not to mention, from the pay you still have to pay back the loan because you can't get any scholarship when you were in medical school. Of course, students that get scholarship don't have to pay any loan, in return they just need to work with the government for 5-10 years if I'm not mistaken. After all that, you will be left like around 1/4th-1/3rd of your paycheck. After studying like dogs, getting mental torture everyday, lacking of sleep like a zombie, and getting paid just enough, you still consider that as highly paid? No dear, in fact, doctors are underpaid. 

9. Medical course are COSTLY.

So, after reading all the above point and you go like "it's okay, I can deal with all that," remember this: medical school is never cheap. So, you pass everything, you have an extremely good result both in high school and pre-U, and as if Lady Luck hates you, you didn't get any scholarship. Yes, it can happen. It's Malaysia and believe me, even straight A's students sometimes didn't get any scholarship. In case that happen, you need to take up loan to pay for the fee. The fees are shockingly expensive. After the fees, you still have to buy the books which are very expensive because it's medical books, all the tools you need in your medical studies such as stethoscope, lab coat, sphygmomanometer etc etc, all that cost a fortune. Depends on where you got your loan from, some loans couldn't even cover the whole course. Your parents might need to cover some of the fees using their money or maybe try to get another loan. Don't you feel sad for yourself? When still a student, you study like hell trying to raise your grades so that if you get lucky you might be able to get a scholarship, or if can't, at least graduate with no problem to start working fast. When you start to work, you work like beast to get the money to pay off the loan/s you got for not being able to get hold of any scholarship last time. 

One more point, not only the straight A's students can take up medicine but also the not all straight A's students are able to take up medical course. Just make sure you have to have a good result in all your science subjects (Biology, Chemistry, Physics) and Add Maths. You need to have a minimal requirement of B in all the subjects above or you will be facing a huge possibility of being unemployed after graduation. It's a new law enforced by the MOH. I'm not saying anyone can be a doctor, I just hope you really understand your own limit and how far you can go. And PLEASE don't lie to yourself because in the end, the one gonna suffer the most is YOU.

Anyway, it's your choice to choose your own future. Just please think carefully, don't make any mistake because your choice now will affect not only you but your family and friends in the future. Is this what I want? Will this make me happy? Will I be able to do this? Can I bear the pain?

Being a doctor is not only about learning a disease, learning the signs and symptoms, 

meeting a patient and getting a right diagnosis but it's more to that. 

It's about making sacrifice, not only to yourself but also to your family, friends, patients 

and basically to everyone around you, being tough and learning to manage yourself. 

There is a lot more than meets the eyes that need to be understand, so dig through and know them well before you take this road as your choice. 

Last but not the least, good luck and may you choose the best road! :)